You can find new stories here. Which is why it’s grotesque for parenting. Once again, I’ve been accused of pedophilia. But we’re talking about one of the most loathsome things a person can be parenting hyperactive children of, so why split hairs?
People say this to me so often because I’m kinky, and I’ve written about it. In my case, that means I like to be spanked, usually with a hand, belt, hairbrush, wooden spoon, switch, or paddle. To be clear—because apparently I have to be—I am an adult. My husband, who is not kinky, is an adult. I realize that many well-meaning parents will disagree with me, but spanking kids is gross. There are a lot of reasons why—it’s counterproductive and ineffective, for starters—but there’s another reason that nobody talks about. It has been for a very long time—probably even longer than it’s been a parenting choice.
A fresco at the Etruscan Tomb of the Whipping, which dates back to approximately 490 B. Nerve tracts that pass through the lower spine carry sensory information to and from both the butt and genitals. Some scientists speculate that these nerves can stimulate one region when the other is provoked. Oxytocin, a hormone that is released during arousal, can increase pain tolerance by as much as 75 percent. So I wasn’t surprised to read that some kids who are regularly spanked experience a surge of oxytocin when they sense danger. It’s weird that no one worries about the implications of hitting children on a body part that is culturally and biologically sexual. Most of my friends, like most people in the United States, were spanked as children.
I was spanked as a child, and I turned out kinky, but I’m not convinced there’s a connection. While there might be a relationship between childhood spankings and adult sexual sadomasochism in some cases, there are also lots of kinky people who were never hit as kids. But if literature is any evidence, it was only in the past few centuries that people began to ritualistically strike the buttocks. Before that, we didn’t euphemize childhood beatings by isolating them to one specific body part.